Listening is an essential skill for building strong relationships, fostering understanding, and navigating the complexities of communication. However, many of us struggle with truly listening to others. Various obstacles, such as assumptions, biases, the need for control, distractions, and ego, can hinder our ability to fully engage in conversations.

In this blog, we will explore these common barriers to effective listening and provide practical solutions to overcome them. By recognising and addressing these challenges, you can improve your listening skills, enhance your relationships, and ensure that others feel heard and valued.

Here is the ABCDE of why listening is so hard and what you can do to become a better listener.

Assumptions

You think you know what person is going to say so don’t listen or interrupt to fill in gaps.

Solution:

Listen with an open mind.  Instead of predicting what someone will say, approach each conversation as if you’re hearing it for the first time. Practice active listening by paraphrasing what the person has said to ensure you’ve understood them correctly. This not only prevents you from jumping to conclusions but also shows the speaker that you’re genuinely engaged.

Bias

You let person’s outward appearance or opinions or your beliefs block you from truly hearing what is said.

Solution:

Don’t focus on any one thought or emotion that you have. Recognise your biases by reflecting on your initial reactions. Ask yourself if you’re dismissing the person’s perspective due to their appearance or differing views. To counter this, try to focus on the content of their message rather than your preconceived notions. Engage in conversations with the goal of understanding rather than judging.

Control

You feel need to interrupt, rush, and/or correct what person is saying.

Solution:

Listen with your heart as well as your ears, remembering the importance of a relationship. Maintain relaxed, non-hurried posture that communicates that their agenda is important to you. To overcome the need to control the conversation, remind yourself of the value in hearing others out. Adopt a posture that conveys openness, such as leaning slightly forward and maintaining a relaxed demeanour. Use non-verbal cues, like nodding, to show you’re engaged. This will not only improve the quality of the interaction but also strengthen your relationship with the speaker.

Distraction

You lose attentiveness because you think faster than they speak, so you start thinking about what you are going to say next.

Solution:

Stay in the moment, hang onto every word. Refrain from planning ahead about what you will say. Maintain eye contact, which will help you keep focused on the person and communicate that you’re with them. Combat distractions by practicing mindfulness. Before the conversation, take a few deep breaths to centre yourself. During the conversation, if your mind starts to wander, bring your focus back by mentally repeating the speaker’s words. Maintaining eye contact and providing verbal affirmations like “I see” or “That’s interesting” can help keep you grounded in the present.

Ego

You put your own neediness to be focus of attention before other person.

Solution:

Work at respecting and valuing the other person. Learn to love your neighbour as yourself. Set aside your desire to be the centre of attention by genuinely valuing the other person’s perspective. Remind yourself that listening is not about waiting for your turn to speak but about connecting with the other person. Practicing empathy can also help. Put yourself in their shoes and try to understand their feelings and motivations. This shift in focus from yourself to the speaker can greatly improve the quality of your listening.

Conclusion

Listening is more than just hearing words; it’s about truly understanding and connecting with the people around us. By overcoming these common barriers of assumptions, bias, control, distraction, and ego, we can enhance our listening skills and build stronger, more meaningful relationships. Remember, effective listening is a skill that requires practice and intention.

Call to Action:  I encourage you to start by reflecting on your own listening habits. Choose one area to work on this week, whether it’s keeping an open mind, staying in the moment, or setting aside your ego. Small changes can make a big difference.

Do share your experiences or challenges by emailing me at janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk  —I’d love to hear how these strategies work for you!

Image credit:  Gerd Altmann from Pixabay 

The start of the New Year is a good time to set out your thoughts and ideas for the forthcoming year and to communicate them to your colleagues.

With that in mind, here are three key points for managers to kick start the new year with their team:

1.  Set Clear Goals and Expectations:

Clearly define the team’s goals and expectations for the upcoming year. This includes both individual and collective objectives. Ensure that each team member understands their role in achieving these goals. Setting clear expectations provides a roadmap for success and helps team members align their efforts with the overall objectives of the organisation.

2.  Promote Open Communication and Collaboration:

Foster a culture of open communication and collaboration within the team. Encourage team members to share their ideas, concerns, and feedback. Schedule regular team meetings to discuss progress, address challenges, and celebrate successes. Create a supportive environment where everyone feels comfortable expressing their opinions and contributing to the team’s growth. Effective communication is crucial for building a cohesive and motivated team.

3.  Invest in Professional Development:

Demonstrate a commitment to the professional growth of your team members. Discuss their career aspirations and identify opportunities for skill development. Provide resources, training programmes, coaching or mentorship to help them acquire new skills and knowledge. Investing in your team’s development not only enhances their individual capabilities but also contributes to the overall success of the team and the organisation.

By focusing on these key points, managers can lay the foundation for a successful and productive year, fostering a positive and collaborative work environment.

Help in achieving your goals

As we embark on this journey of growth and success in the New Year, let’s not forget the power of continuous learning and development. Investing in management training is not just a commitment to your team’s success but a strategic move towards building strong leadership capabilities. It’s an investment that pays dividends in improved communication, enhanced team dynamics, and ultimately, in achieving organisational goals.

As your partner in this transformative journey, I am here to support and provide the necessary tools for your management team to thrive. Let’s make this year one of professional advancement, collaboration, and unparalleled success. Together, we can elevate your team to new heights. Reach out to me to discuss how tailored management training and coaching can make a lasting impact on your team’s effectiveness and efficiency.  Email me at janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk.

Image by jamesoladujoye from Pixabay

The appraisal interview can be summarised as a review of performance to date and a discussion about the future in terms of potential and development needs. So, like the Roman God Janus, it has two faces, one to look at the past and one to the future.

While performance appraisals are designed to improve employee performance and foster professional growth, they are not always well-received by everyone. Several reasons contribute to why some individuals may not appreciate the appraisal process. Here are five common reasons why people might not like appraisals:

1. Anxiety and Stress

Many employees experience heightened levels of stress and anxiety leading up to their performance appraisal. The fear of receiving negative feedback or facing potential criticism can create a sense of apprehension and discomfort, making the appraisal process an unpleasant experience.

Managers, in turn, are often fearful of the potential for conflict during a review meeting.  If performance is not coming up to scratch and they need to give negative feedback or if there is a potential discrepancy between the manager’s perception and the employee’s perception of performance, that could cause stress.

2. Subjectivity and Bias

Appraisals are susceptible to subjective judgments and biases, which can affect the fairness and accuracy of the evaluation process. Employees may perceive appraisals as unfair if they believe their performance is not assessed objectively or if their achievements are undervalued due to personal biases or office politics.

The risk of the “halo and horns effect” is when a manager allows one positive or negative situation to influence their whole evaluation of an employee. They may become either too lenient or too critical of the employee based on a single occurrence.   For example, the employee may have had a good year but the week before the appraisal may have done something wrong and is then given a poor appraisal.; no credit being given for the good work done previously. If this bias occurs, it can obviously lead to inaccurate and unfair performance reviews.

3. Lack of Regular Feedback

When feedback is only provided during annual or bi-annual appraisals, employees might feel a lack of consistent guidance and support. Without ongoing communication and constructive criticism, employees may find it challenging to understand their performance expectations or make necessary improvements, leading to frustration during the appraisal process.

It is important, therefore, to intersperse performance reviews with less formal one-to-ones, to maintain communication throughout the year.

4. Inadequate Preparation, Understanding or Follow-up

Managers who are not adequately prepared or trained to conduct appraisals effectively may fail to provide constructive feedback or guidance.

Employees may perceive the appraisal process as unproductive if their managers lack the necessary skills to offer meaningful insights and development opportunities, leading to a lack of trust in the process.

Lack of training could also mean the managers do not feel confident in carrying out reviews, so may try to avoid them altogether, or rush through them to get them over and done with.

Another issue is the following up of assurances made during the interview, for example carrying out developmental plans, offering training, job enrichment, etc.  If something is promised, it should be followed through.  Remember, do not promise what you cannot deliver.  It is important managers word their agreements carefully if they need to request approval for things such as training or job changes.

5. Lack of Alignment with Goals or Job Relevance 

If employees perceive the appraisal process as disconnected from the organisation’s goals or if the evaluation criteria do not align with their day-to-day responsibilities, they may question the relevance and purpose of the appraisal. When employees fail to see the connection between their performance and the company’s/team’s objectives, they may become disengaged and disinterested in the appraisal process.

Understanding these reasons can help organisations tailor their appraisal processes to address these concerns and create a more positive and constructive experience for their employees.

Training in Appraisals

The best way to overcome the fear of handling appraisals is to train your managers in how best to do them.  Training them can yield numerous benefits for both the managers and the employees.

For managers, training can provide valuable insights and techniques for effectively communicating performance feedback, setting realistic goals, and offering constructive guidance for employee development.

Equipping managers with the necessary skills through training can boost their confidence in conducting appraisals, leading to more meaningful and productive discussions that foster a positive work environment.

On the other hand, employees benefit from well-trained managers through receiving clear, constructive, and fair feedback that is conducive to their professional growth.  They also feel more able to raise concerns, highlight training and development needs, suggest improvements and talk about potential progression, as necessary.

Effective appraisals delivered well by trained managers promote a culture of transparency, trust, and open communication, allowing employees to understand their strengths and areas for improvement, align their goals with the organisation’s objectives, and ultimately enhance their performance and job satisfaction.

How we can help

For information on training and coaching to help support your managers to deliver meaningful appraisals, please contact Janet Baker on 07944 225290 or at janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk or fill in the contact form below.

Useful templates

If you do not currently have an appraisal system in place but would like to consider implementing one, acas has a series of appraisal forms which may be used as a basis for designing your own organisations, or we can help you develop one.  Here is the link:  https://www.acas.org.uk/appraisal-templates

Image:  pexels-sora-shimazaki-5668504

In any organisation, the performance appraisal process serves as a crucial mechanism for assessing employee performance and driving organisational success. While often seen as a routine formality, performance appraisals offer many advantages, not only for managers but also for the employees. Let’s take a look at the benefits that this process brings to both parties:

Managers:

Performance Alignment: Appraisals enable managers to align employee performance with the organisation’s goals and objectives. By setting clear performance expectations and evaluating employees’ progress, managers can ensure that individual efforts are in line with the broader strategic vision.

Developmental Insights: Through performance appraisals, managers gain valuable insights into employees’ strengths and weaknesses. This information assists in identifying skill gaps, providing targeted training, and creating personalised development plans to nurture employee growth and enhance overall team performance.

Enhanced Communication: Appraisals provide a forum for constructive dialogue between managers and employees, where they can formally discuss accomplishments, challenges, and aspirations; fostering open communication channels and strengthening the manager-employee relationship.

Resolving Concerns:  Appraisals may be used as a platform for raising concerns about performance, or to monitor ongoing concerns. Issues should not be stored up just to be aired during performance review but are better resolved during regular one-to-ones when possible.

Motivation and Recognition: Recognising and acknowledging employees’ achievements during the appraisal process can significantly boost morale and motivation. Managers can use this opportunity to appreciate outstanding performance, fostering a culture of recognition and encouraging employees to strive for excellence.

Employees:

Clear Performance Expectations: Performance appraisals provide employees with a comprehensive understanding of their roles, responsibilities, and performance expectations within the organisation. This clarity helps employees align their efforts with organisational objectives, enhancing their sense of purpose and contribution.

Personal Development Opportunities: Appraisals offer employees a chance to receive constructive feedback on their performance, enabling them to identify areas for improvement and growth. This feedback serves as a foundation for creating personalised development plans, fostering continuous learning, and enhancing professional skills.

Goal Setting and Career Advancement: Through performance discussions, employees can establish clear career goals and outline actionable steps to achieve them. Appraisals can encourage employees to take ownership of their professional development, providing a roadmap for advancement within the organisation and creating a sense of career progression.

Recognition and Reward: Recognition received during appraisals for exemplary performance serves as a morale booster for employees. It not only validates their hard work but also enhances job satisfaction, fostering a positive work environment that encourages continued commitment and dedication.

In conclusion, performance appraisals serve as a powerful tool for fostering mutual growth and development within an organisation. By leveraging the benefits of this process, both managers and employees can work collaboratively towards achieving individual and organisational success.

In the next blog, I will discuss why appraisals might not be popular and what to do about them.

For training in how to run appraisals or performance reviews, please contact Janet Baker using the contact form below or by email at janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk

Image by Gracini Studios from Pixabay

By taking minutes in meetings, you will capture the essence of who said what, when, and why it matters. They serve as a vital roadmap for action items and follow-ups, ensuring that brilliant ideas don’t evaporate into thin air. They are a good system of making people accountable, nudging us to turn words into deeds and promises into results.

In a nutshell, minutes can ensure the meeting becomes a launching pad for impactful action and progress.

Add timescales

A great tip to help your minutes to be more effective is to add a “by when” date to each action. Adding a timescale to actions in minutes serves as a catalyst for accountability and progress. It provides a clear roadmap for the team, outlining specific deadlines and milestones that need to be achieved. This not only fosters a sense of urgency but also helps in prioritising tasks and managing time effectively. With a timescale, meeting participants gain a better understanding of a project’s timeline and can plan their individual contributions accordingly. Additionally, it facilitates tracking the progress of each action item, allowing for timely adjustments and ensuring that the team stays on track to meet its goals.

Most people with have two columns on their minutes’ template, one for the discussion points and one for the actions. By adding a third column “By When” facilitates the timescale option:

Try it!

For information and more tips on how to organise, chair and minute meetings, contact Janet on 07944225290 or email janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk to find out about the training on offer.

Introduction:

Calling teachers/educators and lifelong learners! Today, we’re diving into a topic that is not only important but also exciting: resilience. Resilience is like your secret superpower, and we’re here to help you unlock it for yourself and your students. So, grab a cuppa, get comfy, and let’s explore the world of resilience together.

What is Resilience?

Resilience, in simple terms, is your ability to bounce back from life’s curveballs with a smile. It’s about handling stress, adversity, and setbacks like a champion! Think of it as your inner strength that can be developed and nurtured. Resilience isn’t just about enduring challenges; it’s about thriving despite them.

The Perfect Combo: Personal Traits and External Factors

Resilience isn’t a one-size-fits-all concept. It’s a unique blend of personal traits and external factors. We’re talking about your inner determination, optimism, adaptability, and the supportive environment around you. Identifying these resilience factors is the first step in nurturing resilience, both in yourself and your students.

Why It Matters for Educators

Now, you might be wondering why this is relevant to you as an educator. Well, fostering resilience is a game-changer in the classroom. It creates a positive and supportive learning environment where students not only succeed academically but also grow as individuals.

CPD Presentation: Your Resilience Toolkit

We’ve got an hour-long CPD presentation, perfect for inset days, twilight sessions or workshops, comprising of a treasure trove of practical strategies and tools, to help you become a resilience guru! Our goal is to equip you with the skills and knowledge to not only enhance your own resilience but also to pass on to your students.

Engaging, Interactive, and Fun

Learning about resilience doesn’t have to be boring! This presentation is designed to be engaging, interactive, and yes, fun. Learning should be enjoyable because when you’re having a good time, you’re more likely to retain and apply what you’ve learned.

Serious Business with a Smile

While we’re all about having fun, we also take resilience seriously. Building resilience can positively impact lives, and that’s why we’re here. This presentation isn’t just about theory; it’s about actionable steps that can transform the lives of both educators and students.

Who’s it for?

The best part? It is for everyone! Whether you’re a teacher, lecturer, mentor, or part of the pastoral/support staff, this presentation is tailor-made for you. If you’re involved with students in any capacity, this is your chance to make a difference in their lives by helping them become more resilient.

Conclusion:

So there you have it! Resilience is your superpower, and we’re here to help you unlock it for yourself and your students. Get ready for a journey of self-discovery, learning, and growth. Together, we’ll create a positive and supportive learning environment that empowers both educators and students to conquer challenges with a smile. Let’s get started on this exciting adventure towards resilience!

Click here for the course outline Resilience for Educators CPD

Contact Janet Baker at janet@inspiretrainingmidlands.co.uk or on 07944225290 for further information and to book her for your educational establishment.

Image by Franz Bachinger from Pixabay

I read about it on another site, so had to give it a go, searched for MagicToDo and found it under the website  https://goblin.tools

Had to try it out, so put a fairly straightforward item “write blog for website” into the appropriate section, pressed + and within a few seconds, a list of elements appeared, breaking down the overall goal into manageable tasks.  Impressive!

I always use the “how would you eat an elephant?” (a life-size chocolate one, of course!) analogy when training people how to approach a daunting major project; with the response being along the lines of “in bite-sized pieces”.  Now this is a tool I will recommend for people to be able to sort out those bite-sized pieces.  So good!

It may not work well for everything, but it is certainly a useful weapon to have in your arsenal!

Have a look at it for yourself!  I am sure you will be impressed.

We stayed in an hotel in the centre, not far from the Cavern Club, and it really brought to mind what good customer service really is.

The hotel itself was pleasant; nice rooms, well-decorated, spotlessly clean. On arrival, the door was opened by a young lady dressed in jeans and a t-shirt (I actually thought she was a member of the public coming to open it for us). On entering, it was a bit of a surprise that there was no reception desk – very strange not to have a welcoming focal point to aim for. She checked us in on an iPad, sorted our key out and explained it would give us access to the hotel, lift and our room. She indicated the bar area, explained that free tea and coffee was also available and pointed us in the direction of the lifts. Polite and pleasant.

Later on, having been out, we stopped off in the bar area for a cuppa before going back up to our room. The same lady was serving behind the bar and sorting out tea and coffee supplies. I commented that she was multi-talented. She smiled. On returning to our room, she hopped in the lift with us. I told her that I was very excited to be in the hotel as my great-, great-, great-grandfather used to have a shop in that very building, manufacturing and selling musical instruments. Staying in that actual building obviously meant a lot to me. She smiled, said “Lovely” (or something similar) and got out of the lift. I was left feeling deflated and very disappointed.

We were in and out of the hotel over the course of the four days we were there. At no time did any of the staff (all dressed in jeans and t-shirts, which admittedly grated on me) whom we saw get into a friendly conversation with us, check if everything was ok, ask what we had been up to in the day, etc. It was very much customer service, not customer relations, and it made me feel  almost neglected.

It was such a contrast to the three Liverpool hotels we have stayed at previously (shout out to Premier Inn City Centre, Holiday Inn City Centre and Crowne Plaza Speke), where we were always made to feel incredibly welcome, important and valued, and were treated to the famous friendly Liverpudlian hospitality at all times by all the staff with whom we dealt.

One morning, we called in to 200ᵒ Coffee, a coffee shop around the corner, and were warmly greeted by Helen, the Manager. Wow! Talk about first class customer service! She was friendly and chatty and immediately asked us where we were from, asked about our visit, where we had been, etc. When she brought our drinks over, she continued the conversation and even texted her friend for us to check on whether there were still tours going up Radio City Tower. Bright, bubbly personality, she was so welcoming and sociable, we left feeling very well looked after. So impressed, we returned the following day (although sadly she wasn’t in)!

Why mention all this? Because it just goes to show the importance of building rapport with your customers. As my husband said, our hotel staff gave reasonable service. They did what they had to do, no more, no less. But it wasn’t good customer relations. Do I want to return to that hotel? No (despite the family connection). Will I write a good review? No. Not a bad one, but not a shining one (as I wrote for 200ᵒ). How do I feel? Disappointed.

As a customer service trainer (amongst other things), it reinforces what I always tell delegates about the importance of building rapport, of being friendly and showing interest in your customers. It is not only about providing good customer service but also building good customer relations, no matter how brief your contact time is with them. And it doesn’t cost you anything to give it – but it may cost your company in terms of return!

Thank you Liverpool for another great weekend!

As a manager, when faced with a member of your team who is angry, it can be quite daunting.  It may help you handle the situation better if you remember these points:

• First of all, acknowledge them – if you ignore them, it will exacerbate an already inflamed situation.
• Don’t sit down first – ensure you stay at the same level as them. Ask them to sit and if they refuse, stay standing with them. If you sit down and they stand, they will have a psychological advantage of being “bigger” than you. Equally, don’t stand whilst they sit, as you want to create a collaborative environment.
• Let them talk – they will probably have already planned what they are going to say and interrupting them will just serve to annoy them more. Use active listening skills, let them talk, then summarise key points at end to check your understanding.
• Acknowledge their feelings – you can’t argue with feelings, so say things like, “I can see how upset you are”, “I sense you are feeling emotional about this”, or “I understand this is making you angry…” This helps them feel they are recognised and can help reduce tension.
• Respond to the facts – when people are annoyed, they often throw anything and everything into the melting pot. It is incumbent on you to sift through all that information and pick out the actual facts to respond to.
• Don’t be afraid to suggest taking a break – saying something like “Let’s take a breather before we look at how to resolve it” can help everyone to pause and take some deep breaths before continuing.
• Thank them for being open and frank – show that you are open to and appreciate feedback.
• Recognise any positives – have they been working hard, making an effort? If so, tell them you appreciate it and value them.
• If you need more information, ask them – use phrases such as “Tell me more – I would like to understand”, as it shows you are willing to listen properly to them and take time to understand their situation. “I wasn’t aware of this, please tell me more” shows them you are interested and want to listen further.
• Find points of agreement – hopefully you won’t disagree with everything, so attempt to find some areas of commonality or agreement, as this will help smooth the way towards resolving issues.
• Generate solutions – work with them to see how the issues can be resolved. Check they are comfortable with any suggestions before implementing them. Use language such as “Let’s have a look at what we can do to resolve it and fix it together”, to show them you are willing to work with them, in collaborative partnership or “What can we do to improve/change the situation?” giving a feeling of collaboration.
• Take action – don’t just leave it there. If no action is taken, this will make them even more angry. Take action and keep them informed of progress.

Here are some examples of phrases you may consider using:

• I wasn’t aware of the situation. Please tell me what happened
• I understand you’re upset but yelling at me won’t help
• I really appreciate you being willing to discuss this
• I want us to talk even though things might not get resolved
• So that we’re clear, what I heard you say is…
• I need a little more information
• Let’s rewind and start over
• Tell me more, I would like to understand
• I hear that it is important to you. I am asking you to consider my perspective
• I wasn’t aware of that, please tell me more
• What do you think we can do to improve this situation?
• I’m sorry you feel that way
• I value your opinion but I don’t see it that way
• Can you elaborate on what you just said? I need to put it in the context of what we were talking about yesterday
• I will bear that in mind going forward
• Thank you for being so open, I appreciate your feedback
• How can I support you?
• How should we proceed?
• As we’re not agreeing, I think we should arrange another meeting at a later date
• Let’s see what we can do to ensure it doesn’t happen again

It is always better to create a co-operative, collaborative and positive environment, so that people feel listened to and respected, whatever the final outcome.

Please click here for details of the Confident New Manager Programme

Image by Engin Akyurt from Pixabay
 

It is so important for people to mix with colleagues from other departments and divisions, to get to know them and work collaboratively.

Here is a little diagram to give some suggestions as to how to facilitate this. Do you have any other suggestions?